Thank you.

Reading Time: 2 minutes

8 letters. 2 words. More than 1 meaning, depending on who you ask.

For me: I’m thankful for you and this action/your words/your light or I’m uncomfortable and I don’t know what to say, this just seems like the best alternative to silence.

As I am going through this new phase of life, I’m finding myself going through familiar, yet very different movements. We talk about cycles like the Stages of Change – you use a similar pattern for all goals, shifting in and out of the cycle as different actions become easier or harder. Also recognizing how barriers play a role in our abilities. The actions you take and the barriers, however, change. There’s also a foundational difference – you know something different that you didn’t know before.

Not an application to goal setting, but to a new stage of life – I’m doing the same here as I meet new people. As I make friends, as I date. I’m finding myself using my own formula to break down cognitive distortions like I am allowed or I deserve or I am [fill in the blank]…

Here are some things that are true, but feel odd to say out loud and can also feel uncomfortable. I’m saying thank you to most of them when others offer them to me.

  1. I’m a good person. I’m empathetic. I listen and I ask genuine questions to better understand because I care.
  2. I’m beautiful to someone. To many other someone’s. Even on days when I can’t see it.
  3. Smart is allowed to be sexy and beautiful, and we are all allowed to be smart in our own way.
  4. Being strong and independent is not a bad thing and we need to stop talking as though women are can’t do or be what they want.

When you hear things that you’ve always wanted to, but never have in the ways that you desired, it’s hard. It’s awkward and the sting on ears a little bit.

It’s ok to be uncomfortable and acknowledge why, but it’s also ok and appropriate to let yourself sit in the uncomfortable space to learn how to respond to it. Most importantly, it’s ok to say thank you and tell someone why and how their words matter to you.