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Day 345, Quote 42: “A firm decision to do or not to do something”

Some part of me thinks that setting New Year’s resolutionsis a double-edged sword.

A resolution is a firm decision to do or not to do something. You know, I guess I feel like that there needs to be a little flexibility because the year go take some unexpected turns.

On one hand – we all need some kind of goal, whether we call it that or not, to help us move from point A to point B.

The goal could be small –I will make it through today.

It could also be quite large – I will lose 100 pounds. I will meditate everyday for a month. I will run a race every month for the year.

The goal gives us something to look forward to – an endgame.

On the other hand, how do you feel when you realize time is running out? When the year is slipping away and there’s still so much on the “list”.

We need to set goals to move forward, but how do we respond when we don’t cross everything off?

I started as a resolutioner.

I think it’s important to let people have the New Year.

It’s important to have the new week, the new month, but most important, I do want to remind you that a new day is just as good – it’s just as whole and new. I do, however, understand the power of a new week.

The collection of days rather than hours is meaningful.

I continue to make goals for the New Year because there’s something about deadlines that I enjoy. There is something about counting that is comforting – I’m not sure if that’ll ever change. That being said, I do think it’s important to find things outside of our bodies that we can count.

Like, how many hikes did we go on this year – two. We wanted to do a lot more – it just didn’t happen. That was the first thing that we wanted to do together.

I wanted to run every week with the hope to run 10 miles every week – and yeah, it just wasn’t a priority. After my spring semester, which had included two lab intensive courses, my capstone, 20 hours of fieldwork a week, my part-time job at the clinic and coaching – just getting into the gym to workout became the priority.

My priority shifted from the number of miles to just get there and do something. I was able to maintain a consistent level of movement and because of that I have maintained a comfortable size this year, which yes – is down 14 pounds from my highest last summer. I didn’t do anything extravagant between now and last August other than focus on eating a bit better with some loose tracking for a few months at the beginning of the year and working hard on my mental health and sleep patterns.

To be honest – 5 of those pounds came off by accident from October to now when I left my job and decided that working for myself really is what I want to do. I know not everyone else can do this, but you know we all build and grab at our own opportunities.

I wanted to increase my squat, deadlift and front squat – my squat maintained at a 1RM of 205 pounds, but my deadlifts went from 155 to 195for 1RM with my front squat moving from 55 to 95 pounds. Partially showing thatI needed to have more confidence in my lifts and that practice is key forgrowth.

I tried to set goals this year that were bigger than me.

So, saying yes more often was important. Trying new things was important. Writing more was important. Continuing to adapting coaching tomeet unique populations was important.

I tried group coaching and learned that the style of coaching I do doesn’t fit a group setting. It’s also not enjoyable for me and it relies on the participants ability to monitor their own behavior on a regular basis without a real-life weekly conversation that I implement in a 1:1 setting, which I learned isn’t the kind of client that is attracted to what Ido. So yeah, group coaching failed, but it pushed me to work harder at individual coaching and focus on what I can do well.

This year I’ve worked with more individuals from special populations like those with PCOS, kidney disorders, eating disorders, substance abuse disorders, sciatica and other physical limitations, Celiac and other autoimmune disorders…many working concurrently with behavior health specialists, primary care doctors and physical therapists. This not only helpedme expand my knowledge and abilities, it also reinforced my belief in collaboration.

While I work with clients on exercise and nutrition, health coaching also includes mental health, stress management, examination of social environment and much more. The clients’ needs are always put first even if that means another professional needs to be brought into the picture. Understanding my limitations isn’t a negative, it’s quite the opposite – not one person knowseverything.

Working with several individuals who are and were concurrently seeing other health professionals reminded me that in a sense – I don’t matter – everything we do is for the health of the client, which means that there is no one approach to eating or exercise. While I’ve always strived to adapt to each client, this past year, I’ve worked hard to continue to educate myself and show transparency so that I can help everyone even if it means finding a different health professional of some kind for them.

When I look back on the year, there’s a lot I did do, but didn’t realize in the moment like saying yes more often or trying new things. There’s also a few things that I didn’t do – like running all those miles.

There are 19 more days in this year and as I think about next year all I can say is I want to live more.

There’s a lot that happened this year that I didn’t expect –like get a job in my field just to turn around and say, nope, not for menot the way I want to put energy into the world. We bought a house. I allowed my internship to turn into a permanent volunteer position – I didn’t think I would be so invested in them, but they’ve also invested in me. I wrote and self-published a work book. I went back to Instagram but reinforced my purpose.I’ve been working on a podcast that’s launching in January. We expanded our family and are fostering two cats to then adopt them.

I graduated and I’ve paid off half of my credit card debt just in this year. Student loans are kicking in soon and I believe there will always be debt and dying – so this year I want to live.

I want to meet more people and travel.

I want to write more.

I want to continue to be mobile and consistent in my activity. I want to do things that serve me, and aren’t just building towards something specific.

I think I want my squat to grow by 5 pounds, but we’ll see how much of a priority that takes.

I want to continue to help others see how great their abilities are and grow their knowledge base so that they don’t need to depend on someone like me eventually.

I want to bake more and break in my stainless-steel table. Maybe I’ll write more about that too.

I do want to run more, but I need to figure out what that means because at this point, anything is more.

I want to volunteer more.

Before when I thought about my goals for the upcoming year, I felt they needed to be hard and fast, they needed to be just for the year –they couldn’t exceed that timeline. In the most recent years, I have worked to create goals that intertwined and built on each other and the previous year –this past year I tried to have concrete and abstract goals.

I’m interested to see what happens this year because ultimately we can plan, but we never really know where time will take us.

<3 Cristina

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